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05/09/2002 Entry: "What D Hath Wrought."

What time and sleeplessness with the D has wrought:
Metaphorical Ohio: Things have a definite tendency to happen at home when you're in Ohio and therefore less able to deal with them directly.
In other words: any time that something happens and you are neither physically nor mentally nor emotionally in the correct place to deal with these things, you can be said to be in metaphorical Ohio. A metaphor that I'm sure the Chamber of Commerce will not thank me for.
Ex. 'She waited until I was at work for the day to move all her things out of the apartment. And of course that had to be the day I got fired. Man, I was so in metaphorical Ohio when it all went down.'

Loverbutt: Generic name for any statement which contains the basic phrasing 'Don't get me wrong, I love [X] dearly, but...' Basically a slurring of the phrase 'love her, but...'
Ex. 'Don't get me wrong, I love Mooncalf dearly, but she really is an obnoxious little bitch sometimes.'

Gai-zen: Very few Westerners actually understand true Zen. Instead, what they call 'Zen' is something else entirely: Zen for the white man, or gai-zen.
Obviously, very few white Midwesterners have any shame about mixing Zen and Japanese words, either.

The mating call of the TiBook: When a TiBook (Macintosh titanium Powerbook G4 laptop) is in heat, it signifies this by turning on its internal fan. Every other TiBook in the room must then signify its willingness to mate by turning on its fan in response. TiBooks, of course, mate by means of Ethernet cable; nine months later, one TiBook will give birth to an iPod.

iTunes has been crying: On a related note, a capella is how an mp3 player cries. If your mp3 player pulls an a capella tune, it's crying, and you need to comfort it, or it will either continue to cry or start pulling the worst possible songs, one right after the other, in a fit of pique.

Replies: add your comment: currently 1 comment

That's just so cute! Thanks for giving me a case of the lunchtime giggles... (kinda like hiccups only 10 times more annoying)

Posted by Sheerlyevil @ 05/11/2002 11:13 AM EST

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