Amanuensis. Potato. If that's a cork then who am I? Baked goods, hippopotamus. Regurgitate! Alpha male! Alpha male! Blue hair? No, alpha male. Yes.
The meaning of life is not bacon unless, of course, you're thirty-seven or it's Thursday. Carmine scarlet vermilion crimson. Afghanistan was once Yugoslavia but now they're in disguise. Scotch tape, English tape, Irish tape! Wrongful death! Rightful cherry blossoms! Heihachi Mishima!
Lard? Lard! Lard lard lard LARD! Rendered from the very best redwoods! Random Word HELL is not Mikey but he likes it anyway. Sushi flambe'. Bonzo Dog Band? Plaid shoes, diapers, fake nose, chocolate meringue. Be afraid... be very USB hub.
The Lady, or the Fox? I'll take both for $500, Alex. Bluescreen of death, Sad Mac with tones. Canopic jar.
Green glass blue? Snide aside! Time is gasoline, and Ashlea's gay is not straight. Eleven words are the times that try women's souls. Is that an Ashton in my brain or am I just happy to see you? I reiterate: potato! Potato, damn you! Potato potato potato HASH GODDAMN BROWNS. Life is an onion except when it isn't. l337.
I asked someone to marry me today. She said 'NO CARRIER'. I think that means Wolfwood.
DF likes the porno sites, porno sites, porno sites. DF likes the porno sites - why don't you look surprised? Some days you smut the pirate, some days the pirate smuts you. Ragtime, cucumber, caffeinated mint. Yo-Yo is not Yoo-Hoo. Except in 1983.
Gray's Anatomy. No, really. Would I lie to you? Don't answer that. Fishtank. Absurd. Suddenly j-rock!
Frisket gasket Triscuit Bob. That shit ain't left. Masturbation is not capitalized except at the beginning of this sentence. Reductio ad absurdum, syllogism, Silly Putty. Fangirl? Fangrrrrrl. Fargaia. Fanboys happen. This might be a love letter if you read between the sheets.
There is no such thing as Jell-O unless I'm wrong.
Replies: add your comment: currently 13 comments
Well....I'm certainly not going to argue with THAT. Once again, I agree with all of your...points, Moon. And damn; these are the best ones I've ever heard. It's only missing one thing: 40.
For some reason, this made me think about Billy Joel's "We Didn't Start the Fire". If you sing this, it could go to the tune of it pretty well, I think. Heh....
Posted by Wolf @ 11/13/2001 06:04 AM EST
I think the last word should be 'Pisces.'
Posted by W2 @ 11/13/2001 06:09 AM EST
I do too, actually, because I misread it as Pisces the first two or three times I read it.
Also... what in the hell WAS that, anyway? I mean, aside from amusing.
Posted by Ed @ 11/13/2001 06:28 AM EST
This looks like the "Free Talk" section of EVERY message board I've ever been on. O_o Or any chat room on IRC...
Posted by StB @ 11/13/2001 10:02 AM EST
You I Have Sought, of course.
...and
rain
makes
applesauce...
Posted by Mooncalf @ 11/13/2001 11:54 AM EST
Bulldozers and mange!
Posted by Yscaldine (laughing hysterically) @ 11/13/2001 03:34 PM EST
Hmmmmmmm. That was, um, unique. :) Sounds like the lyrics for an unreleased Tori Amos song, if you ask me.
Posted by Ghituslinger @ 11/13/2001 05:21 PM EST
Oh. My. Guardians.
Mooncalf... you... you've Enlightened me! I have reached Nirvana! I thank you, sacred one! May our future loaves of bread see your glory! Poit!
Posted by Saikou @ 11/13/2001 05:57 PM EST
*Claps and whistles and furious applause in general*
That is, quite possibly, the BEST random thing I have EVER seen on the 'net. Be proud of thy random self, Moon.
It also reminded me of Happy Noodle Boy (Of 'Johnny The Homicidal Maniac' fame)..."Fook yooz, pimp daddy! Cook up da weenies filled with cheese!! Dow Jones??! Hail Lord Satan and his epileptic monkey!"
Ah, gibberish.
Posted by Duo Maxwell @ 11/13/2001 07:00 PM EST
I like the Pinky & The Brain reference, Saikou!
Posted by Asrael The Mad @ 11/13/2001 07:03 PM EST
you seem like the type who would enjoy Haruki Murakami novels. Eric Overmyer plays, as well.
Posted by deldds @ 11/13/2001 07:20 PM EST
Is "Ragtime, cucumber, caffienated mint" as naughty as it sounds?
Posted by Nezumi @ 11/14/2001 05:26 AM EST
...I feel confused. Amused, but confused.
Posted by Nathan @ 11/14/2001 04:45 PM EST
